Tuesday
Nov032009
What's Most Important?
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In other words, chaos or comfort; highs and lows or just mediums; stilettos and sequins or flannel pajamas?
Discuss.
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Reader Comments (10)
Peace, hands down!
Passion is super important, that's for sure, but passion is not going to last for ever, at least for long relationships and married couples. The initial flame (the one that makes you rip each other clothes and do it right there in the soup and crackers isle, had it not been for all those people) will die, we all know it. But love is much more than passion and I think that's what we should try to preserve.
Peace. Peace makes me feel cozy. Passion is fun, but exhausting and impossible to maintain.
Is this really an 'either/or' question? I think the best relationships have both--slinky black dresses and over-sized sweatshirts; cuddling on the couch and sex on the kitchen table; chaos at times, and comfort at other times; highs, lows, and mediums...all of it.
Whoa, whoa, whoa: they put soup and crackers in the SAME aisle? Where was I for the press release on that one? So not fair - I'm stuck in the frozen foods section, still using the "...because you could melt all this stuff" line. lol all you want, it works.
I'm with Jillian on this one. It's not so much about creating and maintaining a balance as it is about enjoying the ride up and down those deep-ocean waves - the rush to the top, where it feels like you can jump up just a little and touch heaven, and the slide down the side, into that cuddle on the overstuffed couch next to the fireplace.
Passion and peace are parts of a vast spectrum of feeling, and sometimes the blur in between them can be as enjoyable as the extremes.
Says the single guy who really should get back to his spreadsheets...
'Passion and peace are parts of a vast spectrum of feeling, and sometimes the blur in between them can be as enjoyable as the extremes.'
wonderfully put.
'Says the single guy who really should get back to his spreadsheets...' - you always crack me up, monsieur! I'd say I'm with Jillian, technically, but I'd be lying, because I tend to bail out once I start not feeling the urge / need / desire to slip into, and eventually, out of that LBD. I dunno, I suppose that's the ideal thing, but then again, life rarely lives up to (see what I did here? I slay me!) our greatest ideals. So if it does come down to either / or, I'll take the pj's any day thank you very much.
For me its passion first. Peace is great, I need that feeling too but for me without a huge dose of passion, I can't make it work.
I would like to say peace, but I know myself: passion.
If it gets too peaceful I tend to stir the pot. I am trying to conquer this tendency. I just know that I like to get into a fight about something stupid so we can have a giant make up session. Obviously this is a problem. I am currently single. :)
you mean "more important," not "most important." just saying.
Whoah, whoah! There is no leaving of the anonymous grammar smack-down on TNR, especially grammar smack-down that isn't capitalized. Show yourself, un-capitalizing Literate Blonde! WHY?!?! WHHYYYYYY?!?!?!
Anyway, as far as what I find MO..RE important, honestly, I dunno. I'd say that every relationship needs both, and of course needs both in moderation. But I definitely wouldn't say that there needs to be a balance of the two. I don't believe in balance, and I think "fairness" in a relationship can cause problems (i.e. couples who try to be scrupulously fair about chores, etc., may find themselves feeling slighted when "percentages" are off). I like these answers, though...I was actually surprised to see that there would be this much difference of opinion/preference/etc.
As always, you guys rock. Literate Blonde, jury's still out on you. :)