Don't you wish you could make all your words look pretty? Even the dirty ones? Well, you can with Wordle! Simply type in some text, and wordle will create a beautiful gaggle of nouns, verbs and the occasional adverb.
Here's the Wordle I made for this actual post:
Today I have several things to say, so break out the bullet points:
1. I want to put this little guy in my pocket:
He is so well-spoken, doesn't take himself too seriously, and is quite possibly the most humble actor I've seen in years. He doesn't see himself as a huge superstar, but is grateful to have been lucky enough to work with some of the greatest actors of our time (though he did say that Ralph Fiennes "scared him a little"...which is awesome.)
2. Today has been insanity for me at work. Just when I feel like I'm able to muddle through all the information, I'm stumped by a seemingly simple question. Combine that with the personalities that I just can't seem to avoid in life (they are everywhere, everywhere), and it makes for a harried day (ha! no pun intended.)
3. I just CANNOT get over this whole Wal-mart thing. How could you POSSIBLY walk over a 6'5" dude and keep right on going for the toilet paper aisle????? What product is such a good deal that you'd crush a pregnant woman? I cannot wrap my mind around it...it's so wrong on so many levels (obviously, killing someone is wrong, but there's also something wrong with the "Wal-mart culture"), and I'm having trouble verbalizing the raw emotion of it all. Blerg.
4. Today also finalized for me that I'm OVER Christmas. Sorry. I know some people love it, but I'm more like "eh." More on this later, as well.
Off to class!
So, we'll try a little something new for a spell. I've added a forum/discussion feature to TNR. Sometimes commenting on single posts just isn't that fun...but making fun of other people's opinions in an open discussion??? Priceless.
Head on over...you'll see the link in the right hand sidebar. You must be a member to post, so member up, suckers, and introduce yourself!
So, this place has been around Columbus for years, and as far as I can tell, has never been occupied by more than two people at a time. I remember being taken there as a child, and being scared of fish for several years after that. My boyfriend and I are convinced that it's a front for some sort of money laundering scheme, or porn studio.
Ew...I just got a not-so-nice image of a porn studio that smells of fried cod. Well, more than usual.
Another Thanksgiving survived. Nobody in the family said anything particularly racist or overly sanctimonious, so I only had to hold my tongue about forty percent of the time, which is a marked improvement over some gatherings. Sigh...
This year I am thankful for the little things. Even though our economy is in a world of hurt (which didn't stop Wal-mart shoppers from killing a man today) I am grateful that I have a toilet that's inside, and that I can afford relatively soft toilet tissue to wipe my slightly pudgy American ass. I can buy over-priced coffee at Starbucks, and it warms me while I take the time to read a good book. I recently bought a pair of slipper socks, so my feet will be toasty this winter. And, I have a wonderful man to come home to after a harrowing four hours with my well-meaning, but off-kilter family.
Life is good.
What are you thankful for?
I have been thoroughly enjoying this blog lately. A free-spirited New Yorker with her own make-up line, Doe Deere (who calls her readers "Deerelings" and somehow it's totally cute and non-annoying), gives make-up tutorials, advice, and takes lots of photos of herself in her kitschy-cool outfits.
I love her free-spirit (plus, she's other-worldly gorgeous) and am envious of the way she can just seemingly throw things together with confidence. The girl wears crayon shades of eyeliner and lipstick on a daily basis, and it's just so cool. Sigh. I don't think her clothing would necessarily fit my personality, but there are days I feel like I could dress like her. She makes me want to move to NYC, because I'm sure she's not the only one of her kind.
Anyway, check her out sometime!
Yes, I'm suffering from it: Not Quite Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.
It started with a simple checking (three times) for my keys after I got out of the car (before I locked it, of course) and it's developed into a strong preference of objects in sets of three or five, and labels all facing the same way, and an insane urge to complete a strict pre-slumber ritual (face wash, brush teeth, contacts out, moisturize) or else risk uneasy sleep.
My desire for spotlessly clean areas has grown worse, as well. I seem to notice every speck of dust lately, every dog hair, every crumb, and while the compulsion to CLEAN IT IMMEDIATELY OR DIE isn't always there, I find I can't relax until that crumb or hair is gone.
(And who'm I kidding? When I say "hair" I of course mean "hairs," plural, since I live with three disgusting creatures who find great pleasure in shedding and shitting. I used to have no problem casually laying a coat over the arm of a chair, until I realized it meant hours of lint brushing later. So now, I am an obsessive coat hanger-upper, which really isn't such a bad thing...right?)
I also cannot allow people into my house if I don't feel that at any given moment they could safely eat off the floor, the toilet seat, or the counter. This means that not only are things CLEAN, but they are clean to my neurotic standards, and people who visit should thereby feel ashamed of their own squalorous homes and surroundings.
One evening I came home to find a stranger in my house, a stranger my boyfriend had allowed to enter, even though this stranger most definitely could NOT have eaten off the floor, toilet seat, or counter. In fact, it might be safe to say that he probably shouldn't have even eaten off the plate that was provided for him. I'm telling you, I did not know what to do in that moment. I was paralyzed with indecision...should I immediately start cleaning, even though this would signify to our guest that *I* knew how filthy the place was? Should I play it casually, as if, of course, I love to live like a dirty hippie, and in fact, the items and dust elephants strewn about actually indicate my strong level of creativity?
Instead, I sort of just wandered aimlessly from the bathroom to the kitchen, pretending that this was my usual coming home ritual, you know, to wander aimlessly...while picking up shoes. And I'm thinking, "Of course, my boyfriend understands my neurotic tendencies, so he would NEVER invite someone over on purpose with the house looking like this!"
Right.
He walks in the room and sees me holding a pair of shoes and trying to nonchalantly wipe the counter with my sleeve and says, "See?! I told you she'd be mad I let you in here!"
Hm, thanks for that.
I will tell you that I have found there is no need for me to be on medication. Rather, several glasses of wine throughout the day--hidden conveniently in a coffee mug--helps to make me a much nicer person. It's hard to be obsessive or compulsive when your time is spent insisting you're okay to drive. Or puking. Either way.
Sometimes I want a baby.
There. I said it. Sometimes I want a baby, and I think I might even like it...him...her. Whatever. And I probably would NOT put it in the dryer. And I wouldn't give it away if it were retarded. I might even dress it cute and take it in public and stuff.
Then again...stretch marks.
And poop. Lots of poop.
Also, sore boobs and vomit.
Okay. Over that little urge. Bleh.
There is now a new section at TNR called TTIAWIS, or The Things I Always Wished I'd Said. Whether it's because of my upbringing, or my ridiculous need to always look like "the better person" I often find myself on the back end of a situation, wishing I had said something clever, or devastating, or hilariously funny. Or sometimes I wish I could say to certain people what I really think of them, and of course, they would immediately change their ways because of my amazingly insightful use of words.
I would have told that boy just how I felt about him in fifth grade, and he would have loved me.
I would have stood up for the tiny kid with the cleft palate, and he would have worshipped me.
I wouldn't have cared that those girls in Junior High thought they were way cooler than me and didn't want to get a three piece "best friends" heart pendant, and I would have told them to their faces that they were SO missing out on the inner me and one day, they'd be SORRY they didn't know me, the one with all the, uh, money. Right.
Anyway, I guess I just really need a place to vent, since there are certain situations in my life right now where "vengeance" is a bit too strong of an action, and honestly, doesn't suit my overly lazy nature.
And you! My readers! Feel free to post your TTIAWIS's, too.
Awse.
EMAIL THIS ARTICLE