Five Rules for First Dates
Tuesday, June 16, 2009 at 9:27PMHaving heard numerous stories of nightmarish first dates (and been on a few myself) here are five rules to make your first date a success:
1. For god's sake, drive your own car. This rule may not be as much of an issue in bigger cities, but in Columbus, you can drive just about anywhere in twenty minutes. For dates where you don't know someone very well, DO NOT LET HIM OR HER PICK YOU UP, no matter how chivalrous you think he or she is. First, this is a safety issue, plain and simple. Until you really know and trust someone, you definitely don't want him or her knowing where you live. Second, if the date SUCKS, an escape is more likely if you've brought your own transportation.
2. Dinner and a movie is stale. There is something to be said for enjoying the ritual of eating a meal 
with someone. Conversation can take any turn, you're at least (hopefully) savoring your steak, and there's always a chance to check out someone's basic manners. A movie? Well, on a first date, there should be a significant amount of time getting to know one another, and what if he takes you to see something with Ashton Kutcher and Kevin Costner in it and you hate it because it's ridiculous and insults your intelligence? I mean, you'll never, ever call that guy back again. Ever.
3. Don't be an alcoholic. Watch your drinky-drinky...not only can getting too tipsy cause you to hook up with someone you might otherwise find undesirable, it also can mask the "real you." Set a limit for yourself beforehand, and stick to it.
4. Call for backup. If you're going on a blind date, make sure you have a friend who puts in a call to you at a certain time during the evening. My friend Lisa and I always did this for each other. Our little rule was, "If I don't answer, I'm having a great time. If I do answer...you are having an emergency and I must come get you RIGHT AWAY." This little arrangement worked very well for us, and it was nice to know that you had a friend just a phone call away if you needed it.
5. Be prepared to pay. Never, ever go on a first date without money. While I believe that etiquette dictates that the "asker-outer" should pay for dinner, you never know what someone else's etiquette dictates. There is nothing worse than being out on a date and the douchebag guy asks if "you wanna go halvsies?" While this question is pretty, I dunno, LAME, imagine how much more lame it'd be if you didn't actually have the money to pay your halvsies. On the more positive side of things, if the date is going well, it's always nice to offer to pay for something (and obviously, you shouldn't offer if you don't have the cash).
What are your rules for a first date?
Reader Comments (1)
Though chivalry may be alive and well within me, that doesn't necessarily make it all that cool in the NYC-metro area. I've had some interesting experiences with paying - anything from the insulted women's lib attitude to a look of mystification as to why I'd pay for someone else. It's kind of hard to say "I'm trying to get some" to the latter - I just kind of said something like "well, in my culture it's customary..."
Driving one's own car and meeting in a public place are definitely good ones for any first date - especially if they're internet-originated.
I have to say, though, that I REALLY don't get the whole movie-as-date thing. Especially not on a FIRST date. This is coming from a guy who doesn't own a tv, so I suppose you're all taking your grain-of-salt-suppositories right now, after reading what the wacko just wrote.
Whatever. My manifesto's almost finished, anyway. ;-)